Monday, May 6, 2013

Direct Descendent of Mother Nature Heats Things Up

Midwest snow before we arrived.
Ma and I decided to drive northwest to participate in my uncle's birthday bash. He was celebrating one of those round-number biggies and we wanted to wish him well in person. We also wanted to hang out with our midwestern relatives for a few days. We reside in the balmy South and were traveling to the cool North. The trip was planned for the weather-transitional month of April. Therefore, we had to pack for both cold and warm weather—or so we assumed. What I didn't factor in were the effects of my peri-menopausal body. 

My uncle posted a snowy picture on Facebook on Sunday. In response, I added an extra pair of jeans to my suitcase, threw my boots in the trunk so I wouldn't forget them, and switched out my cool trouser socks for thick, winter socks. When we left on Thursday morning, the weather was still quite cool at my aunt and uncle's house. The snow had not completely melted away just yet. However, it was already 70 degrees in North Carolina, so began our journey in T-shirts and sandals.
My peri-menopausal feet
heating up the Midwest ground.

When we arrived in Minnesota on Friday evening, it was 70 degrees. The next day, the temperature rose to the mid-70s. Sunday, we wore short sleeves and sandals to the Mall of America. When we left Tuesday morning, it was already 65 degrees. I never used my socks. I never used my boots. I was out of T-shirts, but was not about to put on the turtlenecks or sweatshirts still neatly folded in my suitcase. 

On Wednesday, it was in the 70s as we made our way back to the South. That evening, my uncle posted another snowy picture on Facebook. They had received another eight inches of snow since we left town. And that's when it hit me. 
The warm air followed us
home and the snow fell again.

Clearly, my hot flashes are more severe than I realized. The intense burning from within not only makes Hubby sweat at night if he snuggles too close, it also affects the climate around me. After our trip to the Midwest, it is obvious to me that I am a direct descendent of Mother Nature. My peri-menopausal internal infernos are wreaking havoc on the weather. This new discovery also explains global warming, for which I must offer my sincerest apologies. Hopefully we will still have a little ozone by the time I make it to the other side of the menopause mountain.

Micki Bare, mother of three, wife, daughter & writer is the author of Thurston T. Turtle children's books. 

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